Saturday, January 29, 2011

Sometimes....

There are times in life where you can't get what you want. The boy that you want. The life that you want. The friends that you want. You only get what you need....Even if that means you get your heart broken in the process. Nothing works out the way that you want it. No matter what. Life is just heartbreak. Your "friends" stab you in the back. You fall on your knees and noone is there to pick you up. People who are your "best friend" go behind your back. Treat you like shit. They don't care that you're on the edge. About to end it all. Giving it all up for something better....or worse. They don't care as long as they are fine and aren't going to get hurt. Even if they lose their "mate". If I wasn't moving, I'm pretty sure it would end within the week. I'm moving so I can better my life and get away from everything that is bringing me down and killing me. I just wish one of my "friends" would see this and ask me if everything was ok and actually cared if I said "Nah, I'm fine." and realised that I wasn't. If they did I wouldn't end it. I might not leave beacause I know that someone cares. Noone here cares. They say they do but....seriously. I have one best friend who is pretty much a slut and another who loves me deeply but is like my brother and another who never see's me anymore. I just don't know what to do anymore. I love these people but I seriously feel like I have to move on and forget these people. All of them. I don't want this life anymore. I tell them that I'll be back by the end of the year but I don't want to come back. I want to run away....far, far away and never return. Yeah I'll miss everyone for about a month before I make new friends and move on with my life. I don't care anymore. Noone fucking cares. I'm out. I'm fucking over this town. I'm fucking out for fucking good.

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